Emo Dojo
Emo Dojo

Episode · 3 years ago

Got Bipolar Style? Welcome to the Bipolar Party!

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

John tries to demonstrate how a mental health peer support group works with the help of his friends at Bipolar Party. Becky ("That B-Word Show"), Bryan ("Bipolar Belief") and John share issues they've had this past week in trying to help their aging parents in various situations. Listeners are encouraged to join our conversation at BipolarParty.com

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Send comments to comments@bipolarstyle.com or leave a public voicemail response (377) 944-9333

It's only and now it's online Bible this stylecom John Emotions with Bible style. Hey, what's up? This johnny emotions and this is another dog days of August podcast. However, this one is really special. My other show, bipolar style, started about a year ago and I put up a slack channel at Bipolar Partycom so that people who listen to the show could come in and share and just have a place off of facebook and twitter to talk to other people with similar mental conditions and what that's turned into. As also found some other podcasters and now we are going to do a little podcast set up similar to a dbsay meeting, which is the depression and bipolar support alliance, in which we sit in the group where there's only three of us here today, but the we've done it with larger groups, we just did not record them, and we're doing this kind of test to let people listen so that if you are into it, you can come visit us at Bipolar Party and maybe participate in another on upcoming group that's just like this, just recorded for the public to hear how people with bipolar disorders interact with each other. So that said, I said, there's two other people here with us. I will let them introduce themselves. Started on my left, Becky, once you go first. Hi, I'm becky and I have bipolar disorder and porderline personality disorder, and that's podcast. That's why I'm here. Yeah, I told Your podcast you because love I get lots of new listeners on these dog days of podcasting. So, on top of the John Emotion show you're listening to now, bipolar style, becky's got one to promote. Away. Becky's is your Chans. Totally. It's called that B word and we cover everything from mental health, from borderline personality disorder to bipolar disorder. Add lead. Had somebody with aspergers on recently and I have an upcoming episode about did. This is you have identity disorder. So it's going to be pretty cool. Wow, that's exciting. We talked about the disassociative thing in the slack channel. That's pretty amazing. Well, apparently a lot of us with bipolar disorder also feel the world hates us, maybe like borderline personality disorder type symptoms, and also the disassociation when you get so stressed out you don't even know who you are. You don't feel like you're you sometimes, so that's awesome, and sitting next to you. All right, this is Brian. I'm I also have bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder. I don't have a podcasts but I am very active on the bipolar partycom. I'm the consider myself the misfit of the...

...group. That's such a borderline thing to say. I know in Becky's mind she's all know I'm the MISFIT, and in my mind I'm like no, I'm definitely the misfits, but I don't know. I've what's that accent? Everyone here's the accent. Where is that really you hear my accent? I'm I'm from North I'm from North Carolina. It's I'm a red knet from North Carolina. White Trash. Trash is a little rough, but we appreciate you. I love the icon. I come straight for the trailer park. What part of the country are you and Becky? I'm in Ohio, so kind of the middle of America. I'm on the left side in California. So we've got effectively three white people in America. We've got a left of middle and a right side of the country and kind of politically speaking, kind of similar to on the left, middle and right over there. So we don't talk about politics too much in our bipolar party. Just not what we're there for. We all, everybody has an opinion on that and that's not the normal way we're going to typically introduce people in Group. I just wanted to let these folks know because Brian also is going to start a podcast, like he's interested in it, and you could tell most people don't want to jump up on the MIC. He's already got his mic and his computer setup. So look forward to a podcast from him shortly. Yeah, I would expect it, would you think? I think so. I just need to organize my thoughts and make sure I have enough contact to put something out there that people would be interested in. Yeah, or do like I do, just talk even if people aren't interested. Also, it's the greatest thing ever join the party at bipolar PARTYCOM. Okay, so now let's pretend we're actually add a dbs a meeting. Brian, you've not actually been to one, Becky, you have Right, and I've been to the online okay. So, yeah, I'll play moderator and I don't have a script. We're not actually a DBSA affiliated group in any way, but they're the typically read a bunch of rules in the beginning of the group. The one thing that I think is important to reiterate on the podcast and to listeners. When you're in a group setting like this, we're not trying to fix the other person. I'm not trying to help you. I'm not a therapist, I'm not a professional, amout a doctor, etc. So when somebody shares their opinion, I'm the shares their perspective or shares their trouble. When we respond to them, we use what's called eye language, and I don't mean your eyeballs, I mean using the word I. So, for example, if if Joeys said I'm having a problem with my ex wife, she won't let me see the kids that at all, my response would not be have you done this? Have you tried this? Have you? Have you? Have you had you know what I mean. I'm not here to fix him. He's not.

I'm not to grill that person. The way to respond in this kind of group setting is hey, joey, it was my experience when my wife didn't let me see my kids, that I did X, Y and Z. So when we say eye language. That's the best way to reply to a group. It's not as big of a deal with just three of us, but when there's ten of us it makes a big deal because everyone's trying to fix the person who just shared. It kind of gets out of control. Right. So let's introduce ourselves, not the long way, like the way we'd normally do in a group is like, hi, I'm John. I had a pretty good week. A scale of one to ten, I'd say it's about it, seven and a half, and I would like to share later. And then you go Becky, okay, Oh, and I got me now. So just you just say basically like what I said. You said, Hey, I'm Becky, I had a pretty good week or and then whether or not you want to share. Yeah, well, I'm becky and I've had a lot of ups and downs this week and I will probably share later. Probably. All right. Hi, I'm Brian and I I've had some ups and downs this week, because I don't really want to rate myself my week, but I'm going to share later. Okay, excellent. So it looks like we have three shares in today's group and unless somebody has an urgent share, we will start on my left and go clockwise. So, Becky, tell us what you like to share today. Well, it's just it's been a crazy week because my my mom has had started to have seizures and using the car accident, and so that kind of puts me in a difficult mindset. I guess I've been having trouble with suicidal thoughts and Ivigation and yeah, that's kind of what's been going on and I don't feel like there's been any I mean, there are people that I can tell and things, but I don't feel like I'm being heard. I guess I don't know, but you know, I'm safe, I'm not doing anything, but I just don't know what to I don't to do about it. I have similar issues when my parents are in distress, because I'm not really sure what to do. I don't have the tools of the resources to help them. MMM. And it also brings life into perspectives like way, when they die,...

...as much as they get on my nerves, I won't they won't be there to even help me, like I don't feel that they help me much now, but I'm sure they do. You know what I mean? I just not processing it properly or something. But yeah, when they're in distress it makes me feel helpless and hopeless. And once if yeah, what, I don't know the details of how how your mom's condition is making you feel. I just know, like one of my mom or my dad or in that state, I really just feel helpless. So I'm am sorry push you off to the suicidal ideation area, because that always sucks. Yeah, it does. It's it comes up a lot. Yeah, in my experience when I've had this suicidal I aviations, I it, Gosh, you just don't want to you don't you don't want to do anything. I mean you just want to lay in bad and salt. I guess I don't know if Salk's a right word, but so I know what you're going through. Becky. Thanks. I feel that when yeah, it's the I think it's the hopelessness that is that what it feels like to you. Is because a lot of times when I feel the suicidal ideation bit hmm or even yeah, it's more of a I don't want to kill myself, I just want everything to end. It just it. Sometimes things feel so hopeless it's like, what's the whole point? I'm so tired, I'm so exhausted. Can it just please stop? I'm wondering if there's a God, can you just take me out so I don't look like I killed myself? It's right so wanting to end this feeling more that. There's never like I want to punish them for the way they treated me, like the thirteen reasons why kind of bullshit set up on Netflix. That perspective, my suicidal idiation never looks like that. I would never blame somebody else for the way I feel. I feel the way I feel because I it's hopelessness. It's the way I've added up all the parts in my own head. That feels hopeless. And yes, and and as I just hope when people here that we talk about suicidal ideation a lot of times. From almost all the people I've talked to in the group, nobody ever wants to punish the living. Nobody. It's never a selfish move. It's like I'm it's hopeless. It's a you feel so vacant, so pointless, like I'm just taking up food. I'm just, you know, shitting up the river. I'm just, I'm a waste of life. Why I'm I even on the planet here? Let me help society by removing me from the equation. I know when I've been suicidal. Like you, hear these horror stories about get up hitch hikers, you know, and I actually pick up a hitch hiker one day, hoping in my in my head that he would do something to end it so I wouldn't have to do it myself.

Yeah, I know that feeling. That's what you're talking about. Yeah, it's like putting yourself in dangerous situations. When I was in Los Angeles downtown, I used to go jogging through skid row and to the point where I was thinking I'm going to get some tshirts that likes a skid row jogging club or something like that. You know what I mean. But the whole idea was like I'm just running through skid row because maybe I might die here, like maybe, Oh, the white guy got killed in skid row. I don't want that story either, but I was wonder like why do why do we put ourselves in dangerous situations if we're not somewhat suicidal? Is it purely adrenaline? Is it is an adventure, or is it just trying to fight? Like you know how people cut themselves or or harm themselves or scratch themselves to feel like real, to feel if they're real. I wonder if we do the same things by putting ourselves in dangerous situations just to feel something besides hopelessness and emptiness. I think so. I think that's a lot of what it has to do with it. Maybe we should go to amusement parks more often or something. We should feel that void was something more uppet. That's why, that's why I and my mania and suicidal. I mean, I think you can have both the same time. For sure. I'm you know, I drive my car like a maniac and go a hundred and something miles per hour to see how fast I can go, just for the just for the kick of it. Yeah, you know right, and I feel the same way. I think I'm at my biggest danger to myself when I'm in a mixed state, because I have the depression enough to pull me down and make me think everything is hopeless, but I also have the manic energy to follow through, to like to go do something, to make something happen. Yeah, it's tough. I don't don't like to talk about too much because I don't have my own answers, even when I get to that situation because every every time I get to that point it's a different situation and for everybody, every human, it's a different situation. So it's hard to say like this is what will save your life the next time, because I don't, I don't honestly know. That sucks. Feeling today back you feeling better like now than even an hour ago? Yeah, I'm feeling okay today so far. Yeah, it's a really yeah, well, it's Saturday, though. That's always helpful because there's no pressure to work. I mean you could always UN find yourself a little bit, right, like you said, maybe go see a movie or something later. Yeah, I think going out and just something, kind of paradoxically, going out in something, something by myself. Yeah, yes, it's like meditating or just tell, you know, some me time, whatever they want to call it. Nice. Well, thanks for sharing now, B r. If something more sure, I'm sure. I I've been you know, my meds. I'm on a couple different meds that helped me with my depression. I don't know if is this the place...

...to talk about meds? Fu Yeah, dude, people love talking about mad just the one connective thing when you say I'm on Sara Quell or I'm on the mittel. All of a sudden everybody that listens that has bipolar disorder instantly they're like, oh, yeah, I take that. You know what I mean. So by all means, talk about your meds. Well, I take Trintalics, which I don't know. I've heard it's an antipsychotic. I've also heard as an antidepressing. It could be used for both, but it was. It was helping, but it wasn't helping enough, and so they put me on a bill if I too and it made me emotionless and just this week my I've been noticing for a while, Becky, at this is kind of goes along with what your mom's going through. My Dad, my dad's mental stay has gone down and I'm gonna get I'm gonna get weeping now. And I live, I live with my dad and he I have to do everything for him and it's hard. It's hard to be dealing with bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder and also had to be a care taker for an now the early person. So I call my brother, and I've called my brother a few times this week and just broke down crying because I don't I just don't know what to do and that's not something I normally do, is cry. But it's been it's been tough. Are you okay now? I don't mean like, are you okay today? Yeah, I feel a feel okay today. I feel I feel good talking about it. Yeah, it's weird when you hear two dudes talking about it. Like even the way I just said that, are you okay now? It almost sounds like are you done crying? Are you done? Let you know? I didn't need that. I didn't hear that. We don't sound like that now. We need to come like that. Okay, good man. That that's rough and I have the same situation. My share was going to be about also taking care of my dad, so I don't want to trudge too much on that on yours, but I definitely feel the pinch of being, quote unquote, the sick one in the family. But I'm in the middle now. I'm the Middle Age one. I have old parents now that need caring for and I also have kids now who still need caring for and there's nobody here to care for me and they're there. Hasn't been right. That's how I got to...

...this place because nobody cared for me, and it's really troubling on many levels. Just physically. It's exhausting to try to care for somebody when I'm exhausted myself due to depression or whatever's going on that day. I never feel appreciated because of the borderline maybe, or maybe because nobody really expresses the appreciation. It could be a little of both. The whole. You know, just because your paranoid doesn't mean people are not following you. It's the same thing with borderline. Just because I have borderline doesn't mean some people don't appreciate me. Doesn't mean some people don't actually hate me. That I found people that hate me and that don't appreciate me, and it's not the borderline. So and that's also troubling too, because the way we present ourselves, a lot of people just think, oh well, you're not sick, that's why you have to do all the work, that's why you're doing the care take and you're not sick. And like Motherfucker, how do you know how I feel? Right it's that and just putting on the John Suit, just trying to be me every day. That's fucking exhausting, so much so I really feel for you. Dude. I just and Youtube back. You have to deal with your parents that way. Where I right? I wanted to share to my abilify. They have to give it. Give it to me an injection I had about ten years ago. I had gasser bypass surgery and I lost a hundred fifty pounds and so it's been a struggle with meds because I don't, I don't, I don't absorb the meds like I used to, like I should. The way they the way they do, the way they used to do. The gas your bypass surgery is they they make your stomach really small and also shorten your intestines, and so that's how you absorb nutrients. So I'm bidermin deficient and I also am med deficient. So my Med's don't work as well as they would on a normal person. So they had to adjust my med so I take my meds multiple times a day instead of once a day. So that's just a little, you know, interesting tidbit of information. Yeah, it's another kick in the ASS. Right, let me just that one more thing. For people that don't have any kind of mental condition to realize that dude's got to take meds all the time. It's like a clock. You got the little pill box, you got all these things. Were like normal middle aged people. We shouldn't have to be on eight hundred pills, but yet if you want to stay functional, there's a whole regiment you got to go through. It's ridiculous. What's the true relics? I've never heard of that. Is that a different name? It's just got the brand name on the bottom on the bottle. So I don't I don't...

...know. I know one of the person who takes it. I want to ask it my next group to that sounds interesting. I think that's one of the newer ones, like the one you're on. You're on vrail. Are Right Y, like, yeah, that's one of the new our ones too. Are you still like it and still on it? And I like it and everything? Where did they swapping for Lamittel or something else you used to be on? I did. Used to be on the MITTEL and I was not all of them for a while at the same time, but then I recently got off the limittel. Think on us. I don't feel like I was doing anything for me. Yeah, after a while I felt the same. Like most of the MED's eventually lose their efficacy on on me. I don't know if they ever worked or whatever, but yeah, it's not bad to change. I just do it under a doctor's care. Yeah, actually, I just looked it up. Trint Alex as is for. It's for it's a nat how to present. Oh, that's why I don't well, that's weird. They maybe it's one meant for Maatic people, because you know, they they rarely give antidepressant straight up, any depressants to bipolar because they say, well, I'm on that. Yeah, I'm on lithium to for looking intabilify. That's a whole other set of work right there too. Yeah, there's a lot of monitoring that goes involved with that. Right, you have to. You have to worry about your thyroid. This is the thing, you know, I was watching they I live a lot in downtown areas, tons of homeless people and I see how hard it is for them to be homeless, how much work they put out to be homeless, and the perception is homeless or lazy. But Man, these people go through so much work, physical labor, just to be homeless. Dragging your bags around everywhere all day, get kicked out, sleeping on hard cement, Dott a diet. Well, it's kind of the same way when you're sick. Like when people, when we have depression or something, people think, Oh, you just depressed, you just lay around all day. Well, Snow, listen to all the work we have to do. There's so much work involved right being sick, with scheduling appointments and fighting the bureaucracy and getting payments over to their and then, and then the pills. Oh, and then the pharmacy. Are they're out of it, are they? Don't? You know they don't support that pill anymore or things. It's always changing. You never have any peace, or I never did. It's well, you talk about taking taking pills multiple times of day. I actually have an APP on my phone that shoo shoots me a reminder. It's kind of annoying actually, but it gives me a reminder every time I have to take my medicine. Does it give you like a little gold coin? Che like a game? I should fill take it should game a five pill taking. I mean, if that's the will, people love Games. Yeah, so wouldn't hurt if you got little coins for it, right Hey, dude, you play fucking scrabble or anything like that? Do you play words with friends? I did, but I felt real dumb. So Wolf all right, because becky and I are always add it over there. Just probably beat me at most of the time...

...to buy see one. Like every game will get one lucky word. That's all it takes is one lucky word and that's all it takes with anybody. But I'm not always the one who gets the lucky word. I'm probably the least competitive person you you'll meet. Like, I'd rather as Ather. What's your sign, dude? When you're born, I'm a verger. Well, yes, okay, I see that. He'll do it. I'm an aries. I'm like, I can't not compete. I'm like, just keep going and Leah. So that explains it. Yeah, Leo's the same way. All My best friends are Leo's and my son's Leio. My son was born on my wife's birthday, so my wife was a Leo when I was married. Leo's. See, the reason I get along with Leo's is because areas are one of the few signs that can tolerate Leo's. But their fight the fire sign to right during first signs. Yeah, we're just more nuts, but in Leo's we everyone lets Leos think they're in charge of everything, and Leo's are happy with that because they actually think they're in charge of everything and the rest of the world's like that's just a Leo. Just let him think they're in charge of everything. He thinks this, ha ha, that's funny. Now I mean literally. I mean best friend in high school, best friend now, ex wife and first son. That's four Leos surrounded by him. Oh, my best friend that I grew up with like in my set, in my s too, he was a Leo also. Yeah, it was amazing how many Leo's that are just surrounded with them. It's because they're awesome. Well, it's it's because nobody else will hang out with them. That's what hey, but nobody else will hang out with me either. So that's kind of the thing. There's the only thing worse than Leo's like the areas that's like fuck that guy. Whatever. Okay, I'm going to share to before get we get too long here. Okay, did you get enough out, Brian? Yeah, so, and then the moderator comes around back to me and like okay, John, so all right. Well, I had this issue again with my dad, and I don't say again with my dad. Don't have like a lot of issues with him, but, like like Brian and Becky, Dad mom isss you. So my dad has been care taking this property up at Lake Tahoe for years. Nice property is beautiful, right on the lakes. Anytime I want to go get away from the city, I go there. It's free. I love it and he loves it. He's a retired x cop, x vet kind of Guy Living on a fixed income. Well, he loves it there. And the guy he care takes from his super old, like in his nine s and about to die. So, my dad, you got to figure out something to do. You can't just wait until life happens to you. Should be proactive and make a plan, because he's going to die, they're going to sell the property and you're going to have to move. And his whole thing was like, oh no, maybe they'll keep me on as a caretaker and at it.

I'm like, Dude, they're not even going to keep the property like this. If somebody buys this is going to get flattened and they're going to build a condos here. Get Real, like you're older than me, you should know this. If how do I know it and you don't? Anyway, he ignores it. Sure enough, they sell the property. He's got a move by the end of September. That this just happened this week right, like told you. So fortunately, I had him come to the city a couple weeks back and show them I have a spare bedroom. I'm like, you can stay here, I run the hotel. I could hook you up with a with the room. You know, it's like a hotel you can live in. So I can actually hook him up whatever. He's like, Nah, I can't. Citi's not really for me, as I get it, because it's fucking grimy. You know, he lives in a beautiful, Pristine Lake in the forest and I offered him an apartment near Satan's asshole. It's just totally different worlds, I get it. HMM, so he doesn't like this idea. Now he's getting kicked out. So I get this long you know, those emails from your parents are like super long paragraphs, about five of them stacked up. Email like Oh, here it is, here's the email, and it's so he's basically running down his plans. Well, he's going to get rid of some stuff and go store some stuff there, and then he used this really bizarre term. Then I may go mobile, right. HMM. All right, so I don't know what going mobile to you means, because I have different terms, like couch surfing. To me would be staying at a friend's house and then maybe in another house or whatever it's. ME, going mobile means living in your car. What do you think? Maybe where our V or something like that? That's what I was thinking, an RV, right. But since he doesn't have any of those things, I'm like how, what is this mean? But you know what he does have is he has my fucking suburban up there and Tahoe, because I don't park it in San Francisco because it's three hundred fifty dollars a month to park. So I don't need it. I ride the subway, in the bus, in the lift and everything. I keep my suburban up until home. In this email he's talking about selling his old beat up pickup truck and going mobile and and I'm becoming incensed as I'm reading this email. Unlike, am I overreacting, or is this fucking guy talking about taking my new truck? I just bought and I'm OCD. I don't like anything in my truck. I like it clean. I don't want I don't even want anything in the glove compartment. I just fucking super OCD. I'm like, I even took all the badges off the truck. It just simple, right clean. I don't want to buy fucking in it. I want to buy fucking living in it. Nothing like that. And when I get this email, it's under my skin now. I'm like, just fucking guy assuming he's just going to take my truck and go live in it. Like, what the fuck is this? So I'm just wondering if my feelings are valleys and, if so, how much, or if you would react differently. I...

...would, you know, I think that I would probably be, maybe not quite as incensed, but perturbed if somebody just assume that you're going to take my stuff and he's it for their own devices. You know what I mean? Right? That, I can see, you know, I can see the point in there. And again the dynamic. Remember, I'm the sick one. I'm like, people should be helping me, and now I've saved the money. took me fucking forever to because I don't buy things on cred I saved like thousands and thousands of dollars and bought the truck out right. And what? I'm just going to let it sit there and he's going to deteriorate it by living in it. Would you have done anything differently, Brian, or like? How would you respond? Um, I think that I would say something to him, offer to sell it to him. Just say, Dad, you know, the title is in my name. If you want to buy it from me, we can transfer the title. I have a problem with being passive aggressive, right, and so I would I would try to make a conscious effort not to be passive aggressive. Okay, here, well, I'll tell you how I reacted and we'll see if it was right. Because, yeah, it I don't know. I'm tired of being taken advantage of. I'm over it. I'm like past that chapter of my life. So I just send him a quick email, because he can. He conveyed this to me in an email, so I always feel it's fair just to communicate in the same medium back. You know what I mean, m so I just send him a quick email, I said, because he outlined his plans and I said that's all great, period let's not make any assumptions about my truck. I like it empty and clean. It's not for living in period. That's it. Sent them the email. Seem reasonable? Yes, I think so. It turned out to be reasonable. Apparently he send it back. Oh Yeah, I understand about your truck. That's fine, I didn't plan on living in it. So maybe you know. Maybe he thinks mobile is couch surfing. Maybe his I'm going mobile is couch surfing. Maybe we just use different words. So I just want to share that. Like, even though I kind of feel like I overreacted, it was only in my head. The overreaction was in my head. The part that eventually came out filtered turned out to be the right words. Like I said, don't be passive aggressive. Just address it directly and I did the best I couldn't worked out okay, so we'll see. I'm not sure what to do with favor now. Maybe maybe his idea of going mobile is to move...

...into a mobile home. Yeah, well, he's waiting for some vet housing to open up up there in the mountains where he lives, and that he has options. They're just not he's not sure of the time frame. God, I don't think I would have wanted to lead. Yeah, it's there's no work there. I'm a I'd like to do things. I like to engage with people and work on projects and there's nothing to do. You want build the camp fire? Okay, done, that's yeah, that's the project. It's pretty funny. Yeah, but I guess is that the presumptuousness of or the way he said it? I don't know. Anyway. So that was that. That was my big thing of the week. I had other ones, but I'm over it. I was the ones that with the family, always hit me the hardest and the closest ecent. It really. Yeah, so sensitive about that stuff, because the thing is, like, I know he doesn't have any extra money. If I offered to sell it to him, he couldn't. Baybe there's no money for he can't buy it from me. The Best I could offer to do is like sell it and give him some money. Just straight up here, have some money, go buy what you can with that money, and I'm going to buy something to use in the city or whatever. Bright and then I'm like, well, why should I do that? I don't know. And then I started thinking, Oh, I don't even need a truck. anyways, when I just sell it and buy a Badass computer and some more podcasting gear. So I mean, I can buy a lot of stuff, but I like yeah, and then my dad's a whole. No, no, we need the truck. And am I? Who is we, motherfucker? You're up there driving it around. I'm never in it. But I don't want to be a dad. That's what it all just all gets down to. I just don't want to be Dick. He's like, it's my dad's like, well, why don't you help you dad? I'm like, I'm helping him as much as I can. I gave him a nice truck to use over the winter time, and that a dad. But just just because you give somebody something doesn't mean that they can keep taking and I felt like it was leaning towards that. Situation. is becoming a slippery slope and I'm glad I nipped it in the bud succinctly and without blown a fuse too much. Yeah, anyway. So that is how a group works, and thanks for Becky and Brian. Thanks you guys for making it seem real and sharing your real things. Thank you. Yeah, here are hosting and everything, and so remember, for anybody listening still to the days of podcasting, go search out that B word. It's a podcast with Becky from Ohio. Let's me, yeah, talking about borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder and all of the other connective tissues, and shortly we'll hear from Brian in North Carolina when we get him on his own podcast as well. In the meantime, you can meet up with all of us at bipolar PARTYCOM. Just type that into your browser, you'll see a place to request a link and then you can go download the slack software or APP or whatnot and hang out with us. It's basically a safe place for us to share and commiserates and you could see and you could see the...

...misfits and action. Yeah, yeah, you can. You can hang out with all of us who feel like we don't fit in with the rest of the world because of our borderline personality disorder. But if you feel that way, then check it out. Maybe you maybe you have a personality disorder and he just didn't know it. We're happy to walk you through those things and welcome you aboard to your newfound knowledge. All right, guys. Well, have an awesome Saturday. I appreciate your time. From San Francisco, I'm Johnny Emotions and we will see you next time. Styles on I cheese follow. Excuse me.

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