Live from Emo Dojo
Live from Emo Dojo

Episode · 3 years ago

Keep Talking Mental Health! Beka and Joe Lombardo, Bipolar Style

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

John Emotions talks with Beka and Joe Lombardo from the Voices for Change 2.0 podcast on their relationship as a mental health 'power couple,' Beka's book 'It's Not Your Journey,' and the origins of their #KeepTalkingMH hashtag. Trigger warning; self-harm

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And now it's online Bible this stylecomyes, John Emotions, with Bible style. Hey, what's up? Thanks forletting me back in your head. I appreciate you subscribing to the bipolarstyle podcast. Today is an especially cool day. I had kind of arough weekend. If you want to hear about that, I whine about itover at Johnny Emotionscom. Here on bipolar's style, however, welcome Becca andJoe Lombardo from Detroit USA. They together are both mental health advocates and areresponsible for the Hashtag keep talking, mh. So what's up, guys? Thanksfor joining me. I appreciate you being here. Hey, thank youfor having us. Yeah, absolutely, thanks for thanks for welcoming US ontoyour humble little show. Appreciate it. So, Joe and I go back. We had a little conversation beforehand to hopefully get the guy talk out ofthe way, but I remembered that you guys are like the power couple ofmental health. But I only bring that up because Joe's twitter Hashtag, twitterhandle, is power slave one thousand nine hundred and seventy four, which isawesome because I'm a huge iron maiden fan. In fact, I'm wearing a DerekRiggs original shirt right now. I'll have to show it to Y.I'll take a picture of it. Nice. That's all. Which one is it? It's one you haven't seen. He did it for an autism anautism fundraiser, and it's got Eddie with his the top of his head explodinginto puzzle pieces. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, it's amazing, I say. Yeah, I look to see a picture of that. I sawhim at a comic con kind of place. He was hanging out there drawing picturesfor people and he drew a little Eddie in the coffee table book Igot. So yeah, anyway, Joe and I are huge metal fans.So all that aside, maybe I have some metal music playing underneath us rightnow. That explains it. So let's get let's get back to I know, I know, if we keep talking metal much more, backs eyes aregoing to glaze over because she's not exactly the the metal fan that you andI are. Some metal stuff that I'm into, but not not man,not everything he listens to. I know. I just buy the TSHIRTS for Christmas. FROTHER, that is a firm supporter. I appreciate that. Yeah, that's that's the extent of their support, though, is that I can't gether to listen to any of it. In if I play runder the hills, she gets mad at me because it's stuck in her head for threedays. You were lucky to have found one that will stay with you.I am most of my metal friends are single, especially when you're still inthe metal at our age. They're like, okay, dude, all right,have grown up yet? No, not yet. Toys arrest is closing. Damn it. Okay, started on that. So Hey, I wantedto. So both of you are like a mental health power couple now,but obviously you came from different paths. You're from the same geography. You'reboth from Detroit area. If what did mental health issues bring you together,or did you come together and kind of discover your each each other's backstory afterthe fact? It was as a good questions after the fact. I meanwe met. It's funny. We when AOL first started, you know AmericaOnline first started, they had penpal features where you could pick an area ofthe, you know, United States to be a penpal with somebody, andI was picking Michigan people because I want you know, with the hopes ofmeeting them some day. And that's how we met, was through AOL ona pen pal thing, Yep, which is why we still have AOL emailaddresses to this day. And embarrassingly, yeah, her email isn't quite asbad, but mine going on forty four next month. It's embarrassing on alot of levels and I have to clarify that with everybody I give it tonow, you know. But it's almost...

...like a retro kitch kind of thingdown, don't you think? Because a lot of people are actually getting landlinesagain, like after not having had a landline for five or six years.So just tell them like, yeah, this is rare. Man, wewent talking about the old school. It's like your hipsters, grow a Goateee, put on some flannel, get you well, I got go tea partdown. I'm good. They're halfway to hipster flannels warm. So so,yeah, the pen pals, Oh that's neat. Yeah, we're pen pals. And then we met in person and we are schedules were too different atthe beginning, like he lived on the other side of town. Yep,you know, we just couldn't seem to connect. So we kind of letit go. And then, yeah, a while later it was like maybeof one thousand nine hundred and ninety eight. We will what happened. Was Notwas okay, I'm going to let people in on something that they mayor may not be aware of. Yeah, and this is something that we don'ttalk about a lot. One back and I first met due to myown ignorance on the subject, I knew that she had bipolar disorder and shewould do things self harm and whatnot. I never kept it from anybody.I was. She didn't. She was very upfront with it and it Iwas. You knew what it was. Becca, back then you were diagnosedalready. Yeah, I was diagnosed at age nineteen. Yeah, okay,and I'll be honest with you. It it scared me and so I,in my ignorance and in my I'm ashamed to say, I I ran away. You know, I didn't know what to do, how to take ifI was going to be strong enough to be able to be there for her. And we had met. It was we had met in person summer ofninety nine and stop talking. And then about March of two thousand and one, we reconnected and, you know, we would still talk here and thereand she couldn't ever really figure out why I had left back then. Andeventually I was asked with her and I told her. And what you reallyscared of the bipolar, or do you think I might have just been scaredof being in love? I didn't understand it, okay, and I andhonestly, I needed to grow up, I needed to mature a little bit. And and you know, during the whole time that we were apart,I still thought about her. I thought about her a lot and I wonderedhow she was and I was concerned for knowing what she had been going throughand that she had been in bad relationships previous. And so we started,actually we started hanging out. It wasn't two thousand and one. It wasbecause we went to that wrestling thing in August. Yeah, one of thethings that brought us together was our love of wrestling. All right. Yeah, so it was like August the two thousand and we went to a wrestlingshow and it was her and I had a couple of my band members,band I was at the time, and a friend of hers, and afterthat we kind of kept talking stay in contact and that March of two thousandand one. We started seeing a little bit more of each other and,you know, I was really trying to open myself up to who she wasas a person and getting past what she was dealing with, you know,and realizing that this woman was just amazing, she was incredible, she was funny, she was beautiful, she was intelligent, she was everything that Iwas looking for and I wasn't going to let an affliction that she was dealingwith come between that. I was going...

...to embrace it and be her rockfor her, because I needed one, she needed one and I needed her, you know. So, yeah, we don't talk about that very earlytime that much, but yeah, that's so. I don't blame him forthat, you know. You know I don't. I don't sit around andthink about, well, he screwed me one day, or whatever it's.I I understand I lost a lot of friends and, you know, Iwould have, say I had a friend come over to watch movies and Iwould leave my stack of pill bottles out on the shelf of my in mybedroom and they would see that and I would never see them again. Yeah, you know, so as I was on so many meds at that pointand you know. So I don't. I never I didn't understand where hehad gone and where it went wrong, but I didn't hold it against himbecause, you know, deep down inside I know that it's very difficult thiscease to deal with, especially for someone who's kind of a fixer and wantsto make everything better, right, right, and you know, you have tounderstand that you can't always make everything better for the person. Yeah,and that was it. That was a tough lesson to learn to you know, because early on I wanted to fix it. You know, I wantedto you know, I would go with her two doctors, when I stillgo with her doctor's appointments, but I would go and, you know,be all full of bluster and everything, wanting to get her you know,wanted to fix her right, right. Yeah, and finally one day itclick. It's like, well, I can't fix this, you know,only she can fix it. What I need to do is be there forher and whatever way she needs. So, anyway, by May two thousand andone, we were dating and we were married August. Third we nice. That's actually like a very traditional kind of romance cycle, it sounds like. So it's interesting because when we think of ourselves as unusual or abnormal ordisordered. But it's nice to hear a story of like a normal romance kindof developed between two people. So, but Joe, do you have likemental health diagnosis of any kind? Nothing I would consider official. I haveanxiety issues and I do have a prescription for medication, you know, forone for those days that I do feel, you know, she's anxious. Yeah, and but I don't take it that off. And Yeah, Igenerally I can. I can keep a pretty good handle on it. Um, he said, a little bit of depression here and there, but yeah, it's been primarily it's not one of those things where it can be forthose of us with bipolar where somebody's like why are you depressed and you haveabsolutely no idea. Usually his stems from, you know, a loss or adeath and one of our families or something like that. He doesn't getreally the the random, the the mood suit. Yeah, the random,mostly mood swings, because I get mood swings. Yeah, but you know, I'll it's there's more reasoning behind it, I guess you could say. Um, then not. So, you know, I've don't know. Imean I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and you know, I actually had areally bad depressive episode a couple weeks back. So I'm going to talk with herabout it and, you know, kind of get some insight and seewhat she wants me to do. You know, but it sounds like you'reable. You're more open than most other men I talked to about mental healthissues. Do you think that's in part because you live with Becca? It'sabsolutely because I live with Becca. You know, I being with her forfor guy, this August is going to be seventeen years baby, being withher that long, seeing the roller coaster...

...that she's been on with her lifeand being with her through everything. It's helped me to recognize that in myselfand in others that we come to, you know, and we've had familyand friends come to US asking our advice now, you know, which waspart of the reason that she wrote the book, part of the reason thatwe do the podcast. You know, we realize that we want to helppeople and so, yeah, it for me, it helps me now becausenow I can you know, it's not a one way street, it's atwo way street. You know, if she's having a bad day, she'llmessage me while I'm at work or she'll call me into Hay I'm not havinga good day and I'll try and talk her through it. And now Ican do the same thing with her, you know, if I'm having,you know, a bad day for whatever reason, I can talk with herand she'll help me through it as well. That's so great. It's so great. And you mentioned the book, So let's talk about that a bit. So sure, Becca under the name Rebecca, Rebecca Lombarne. She justgoes by Becca Lombardo on twitter. If you're looking for there, be Eka. She wrote a book called it's not your journey, and let's talk aboutI mean, just tell me if you don't want to get too deep intoany of these things, but I think you like to share, so I'dlike to hear about what brought you to attempt to take your life. Well, it was a lot of things, a lot of things that I waskind of let letting build up inside me and I wasn't dealing with her processing. And you know, it started back with my mom's death and then,you know, my brother died on my birthday in two thousand and eleven.Life is so coul that way. Yeah, and I knew that my depression wasgetting worse, but I was kind of trying to we I had likea home multilevel marketing business from one of those companies selling like candles and stufflike that, and I was really throwing myself into that and I was doinggreat with it and suddenly I started to kind of tank it. Like Igot into a fight with the women that were on the team that I hadand the company. I made the mistake of calling one of the girls abitch and the company called me and reamed me out and it was just kindof a breaking point when I got that phone call. I know it allsounds kind of silly, but when you combined it all together and you're notprocessing or, you know, talking to anybody about it, it becomes verybig and it's like a giant weight on your shoulders. Yeah, that's justone aspect of what she was going through there. There was a lot morebehind that, but that was that. It's almost like that was that wasthe result of the other things. I get to the same point. Idon't know if it's Hypo mania or intense depression that makes me lash out andanger, but yeah, they're definitely times where the week's worth of events willculminate in me writing the wrong sentence in email to a boss, and sometimesthat might get me fired, and it's like well, actually, yeah,of course I would have thought of it differently had the prior six days nothappened. Yeah, life just some in and I don't know if it's peoplewith bipolar particularly, because a lot of people don't have a weight of eventsand get their emotions out as they're coming through. Like we tend to blockthem up and keep them to ourselves because I got other shit to do andthat person doesn't really want to listen to this. So, yeah, Iknow I'm particular. That sounds so familiar to me and I know there's somuch building up. It's that. Yet, like you said, that's just theend results, surface stuff. Yeah, that's the way you see, butso much cause that. Yeah, it's a pressure cooker, you know. It's just strather broke the camels back, you know, perviously. Yeah,and honestly, calling someone a bitch that's pretty mild. I mean,you know as well as I do there's plenty of people that are out inthe streets waving knives around, getting shot by police because they're just lost theirbuying momentary. I mean you know that...

...it can. It could wrap upso high that people literally die. So for one, I guess. Jeez, I'm glad you really you're here still, because all of that, it doesn'treally matter how you got to the point of engaging with suicide ideation,but once you're to that point it doesn't matter. It's just such a bad, dark, lonely place to be and I'm glad you made it back.You're not the only one. Yeah, sure it was. It wasn't easyat all. And you know I used to practice. Well, I'm recoveringfrom self injury about five years now. Yeah, and it'll be. It'llbe five years in June. Yep. What's that like as an adult?I worked in the juvenile hall and I remember the kids would scratch themselves withpaper clips, for example, and if anybody's listening, that's a trigger warning. Than obviously fast forward this episode and back at you don't have to talkabout that if you don't want to, but I'm just curious. As anadult, does that manifest itself differently than when you were younger? No,not, for me it doesn't. It's pretty much the same it becomes anobsession to a degree, you know, once you've got the urges. Andfor me personally, what would happen is I would visualize it and the theimage would not leave my head and I just was constantly obsessing. And atfirst the whole thing makes you feel better, you know, and then when you'redone with it and you're looking back at how you, quote unquote,failed, then you feel even worse. Now you're in pain and you knowthe physical level and the emotional level, and then you feel like you've leteverybody down and it just makes you want to do it more. Wow,yeah, get caught in that. It's just downward spiral. Yeah, butback when she first explained it to me to help me understand what she wouldwear, her mindset was is she would be and in such intense emotional painthat she had no way of expressing it. So hurting yourself would be the physicalmanifestation of that emotional pain. But then she would be so ashamed aboutdoing it she couldn't show anybody. Yep, so nobody was seeing it anyway.Worse, and that's how the cycle would form. You know, she'dfeel worse, she would do it, she'd feel even more worse. Yeah, that's a word the same. Yeah then, yeah, shame. Shewould hide it, which became like her own little game underneath the surface.Nobody sees it, nobody hears about it. You hide it with your shirts or, you know, you cover up the scratches or whatnot. That's prettyinsidious. But you know, I wonder because when you explain it to me, it sounds romantic in my head, because I don't I don't mind painand I always think back to people who like getting tattoos. Every time I'vegot a tattoo, I'm like, Oh yeah, there's a release of endorphinsfrom receiving so much pain at once and of course, like when you're donewith that Tattoo you're magically absolved of the guilt because like, Oh hey,I'm cool, I got a tattoo. But I wonder if there's something inthere, because there's definitely something to that pain distracting you from your life andif you know the pain is not going to kill you, like you're notsawing off your leg or anything. But I wonder if there's something in ourbrains that triggers just the release of the of the endorphins or something that weneed that were unable to get elsewhere. Yeah, that's part of the theorybehind self injury that, you know, I've learned over the years is thatit releases the endorphins and gives you that you know, I don't know howto explain it, relief, so to speak. It's really now it's arelease. It's a release and and it you know, it's difficult, it'sit's I could start is, it's a constant struggle. You know, youget the images in your mind or the feeling like you're so for me itwas always started out with anxiety. I would be super, super anxious andthe only way to calm myself was the self harm. Well, so,yeah, it's been a constant struggle but...

...yeah, I'm grateful for the lastfew years of recovery being cleaned. Yeah, and you know the thing with herincident five years ago, and what was you know that she wasn't specificallytrying to and her life. Yep, per se, it was she wantedto end the pain. Yeah, she was in a lot of pain anda dark place and that's all that she wanted, you know, and atthe time her mindset was, you know, if I'm not here anymore. Well, everybody'll be better off. Yeah, and yeah, my pain is done. And you know I'm you know, and you know, people at thetime accused her of being a coward, of being selfish, of all thisstuff. How could she do this to me? How could she dothis to her family? All this horrible stuff, and you know, thething is is number one. You don't get to ask that. Huh?That's right, you don't. You know, this is a thing between her andI and her and her family, and you know the you don't likeit, find, leave, you know it. Change the change. You'renot you're not gonna be there to support her through this, to ask herhow, how and why she's in that much pain to begin with. Todo that, you know, when you're in the the throes of that,you're not rationally thinking about, you know, how this is going to affect thatother person. You're thinking, I don't want to be in pain anymore, I don't want to hurt the people I love anymore, and if I'mnot here I can't hurt them. Right, you know, that's the thing.Right, it's like our perception of our lives impact on others is skeweredbecause of our disorders. So a lot of times when we don't think ofsuicide, as you know, escapism at all. We think of it asending two problems at once. I'm ashamed and I'm a burden on my familyand I'm also in pain and internally, you know, tortured. So Hey, if I end this, I don't really want to die, but itseems like the best options of all that I can think of. And I'ma reasonably intelligent person. So when you when you start to kind of intellectualizethe whole idea of suicide, it gets really dangerous right there, because you'reboth clearly smart people and you can rationalize things, but if you start rationalizingthe negative side of things, it could go downhill really quickly. Yeah,sure, you know. And you know once she saw the other side ofit and you know how everybody actually did care about her, you know then, you know, then she realized and she felt bad obviously about that,and you know, I was never angry with her about it. You know, I was never mad. I was never you know, how could youdo this to me? I felt terribly about the whole situation and all Iwanted to do is help her pick up the pieces and, you know,start over. You know, that's where my mindset, well for a book, comes into you know, got out of a horrible hospital situation and thenstarted my blog, which was very freeing and a lot of people liked itand said it was good. So eventually I began to explore the option ofturning a blog into a book and you know, the rest is history.Well, that's I did that. So back up a step. What madeyour hospital experience so sucky? Well, you got an hour. Yeah,the original place was just our you know, we actually live in between a firestation and a hospital in the hospitals literally five minutes from us. Youcan walk to it. So it started out there and you know, Iwas under Suicide Watch while I was there...

...for about four days. I wouldn'tlet me shower anything, and then they came to me and said, youknow, the the fact that the matter is because of what you've done,the state is having you committed, and they told me about this this oneplace that was an hour away. Yeah, and it sounded like a nice place. We looked it up online and everything and it seemed really nice.The problem was they were they didn't have power for the same period of timewhere I needed to be admitted. So they found this other we literally we'reout of power. Yeah, yeah, the power went down. Yeah,my Gosh. Yeah, I remember there was a storm that they lost poweron that that time. What had happened? Yeah, but, yeah, thenthey physically lost power. It's God. So they couldn't. Yeah, sothey couldn't accommodate her. Plus, I think they're trying to get it. By the time they got a free bed for her, that's when theylost power. Yeah, so they sent her to this other place in downtownDetroit, in the heart Ro wasn't downtown, but it was in the heart ofDetroit in an area where you don't want to be, and that thehospital was just it was. It was a horrific experience. I mean Ihad to be striped shirt searched when I got there the treator like a criminalthey did. And there are people there that were freaking out while I wasbeing you know, they did the intake part and there are people screaming inthe hallway and fighting in the hallway and if they didn't calm down they gavethem a shot and just threw them in this empty room and they just likelaid on the floor and drooled like a straight up looney bed, every thething you imagine from a kid when they say you go into the crazy hospital. That's what that sounds like. It's exactly what it was. Was awoman who kept taking poop out of her toilet and smearing it on people's doorhandles and you know, it just I can't even it. I can't even. And thankfully I was only in there about four days, but you know, it was four days too long. It it felt like forever and that'sa good learning moment this. I had the same conversation with the person overthe weekend who had gone through something similar, and we both concurred with what you'resaying now. Is If, yeah, it just basically the worst part aboutattempting suicide or getting to that level is actually going to the mental hospital. It's it's either boring or miserable or scary or designed to make you crazier. It's just like, what the fuck, this is not going to help anything. So we came to the conclusion that note we're not going to tryto commit suicide ever because we don't want to go back to that. Inthat house. Yeah, yeah, that's a that's a big force for metoo. That's always in the back of my mind. You know, Ifinally got to a stage where suicide doesn't seem like an answer for me,and that's a big part of it. Is My most recent experience at thehospital and and I'll never I'll never get that way again. Yeah, yeah, they already the irony of that Shitty healthcare can actually cure you from oneone piece of the mental health puzzle. It's like, Yep. Anyway,I don't want to belittle suicide or anything, but for those who ever thought ofit or you know, hopefully not thinking of it now, but ifyou have ever and didn't quite make it to the hospital part, consider yourselflucky. The hospital part is just miserable. Yeah, for sure. So then, so you wrote the book it's not your journey. People can pickthat up on Amazon. Look for it's not your journey from Rebecca Lombardo.And then the Internet came around and and twitter happened. Right, you guysgot on the twitter a few years back, HMM, more so her than me. I'm a bit of a late bloomer to it. I kept tryingit and I kept getting confused. They didn't understand hashtags and it all seemedlike a bunch of gibberish. And once I started to figure out exactly whatwas going on, then it became a valuable platform. Yeah, then shewas like, Oh, this is great. I'm like, I don't get it. Yeah, I took a suck...

...in because you have the ability totalk to famous people. Is that it? Yep, it's right time. Whenit when it actually happens, it just makes you it's like feeding anaddiction. It just makes you want to do more twitter. Joh, Igotta, I gotta tell you this because you'll appreciate this. I have talkedto Dave Mustan on twitter. Oh, Nice, yeah, DA's interesting character. Yeah, that's when are were putting it and he yeah, we weretalking about the Netflix Daredevil TV show because the first season to come out andhe hadn't seen it yet and I was just talking to because I know howmuch of a punisher fanny is and I knew punisher was going to be inseason two. So, but anyway, I digress. Twitter, now that'sfun. I do the same thing. You Know Maria Bamford, she hasbipolar and she has the spence. She's a standup comic and she has ashow called lady dynamite. If you guys have Netflix, check out lady dynamite. It's like basically her life as a bipolar person. It's amazing. Soshe was remember years ago, maybe less than ten or so, target hadto add where a lady with the red sweater would just like hyperactive, runaround like Manic, shopping waiting for target to open. That's all sounds vaguelyfamiliar. Yeah, you might see it on old, old youtube ads orsomething like that. So, but that was this comic name Maria Bamford,and apparently during those period she was manic and in her new kind of storyof her life, Meta Comic Series, they retail that story. Target isnow called paychecks and but they talked about how they harness her when she's manicand then when she's depressed they will still want more from her. So itis really interesting just like Oh yeah, that happened and that happened. Andpart of the series she goes back to Duluth, what she calls her blueperiod. So the whole tenth of the screen is blue. So you knowthat she's jumping in time anyway, the NE effect was a she's like famousbipolar person and when she responds to me on twitter directly or answers like aquestion that I could tell like Oh, that's a human, a human actuallywrote that. I guess it's super excited. So I be you're right. Twitterdefinitely levels the playing field in a really cool way. Yeah, andthen, so you discovered Hashtags, right, or you made up hashtags or youjust discovered the power of them. Yeah, that's basically it. Forthe longest time, I just I would, I would. I was one ofthose persons that would do Hashtag. I don't know if this is working. Let me know if you're going to you know. Yeah, those reallylong ones. And Yeah, I didn't it. Didn't understand that nobody wasgoing to be looking for my you know, see part sentence right, that singleHashtag. I don't know if many people know that, though, because, like novice users don't often realize if you click on a Hashtag on twitter, it'll take you to a new page with everybody talking about that Hashtag.So if you didn't know that, check it out. That's why it's also, like you said, it's silly wohend, because I know a lot of people. There's a certain type of person that will hashtag anything like, Ohmy God, I don't have any milk for my cheerios, Hashtag, nomilk for Chereos. But if you go click no milk for Cheerios, there'slike one Hashtag in the whole world that says that. But if you goto a cool and if you make up a cool one and kind of nurturethe Hashtag over the years, you really created a nice database of quotes andlinks and all that sort of thing. Yeah, so how did you come? But Long, too long time to figure that out. And when youdecided to make one, why did you make it the one that you endedup making it? Like, how did you come up with the name?was there any deep thought involved, or you like a fuck it, let'sjust call it this. There I wouldn't say there's deep thought involved, butbasically what I did was I went to shoot. I can't remember the websitenow. It's just I'm just your on a blank, but it's a websitewhere you can basically buy Hashtag eggs.

You become the the creator and thethe holder of Hashtags and you pay a very small, minimal fee and itbecomes your Hashtag and I knew from piers on twitter that hashtags could be reallypowerful. I've watched, you know, stigma fighters and the not a shamedproject and no stigmas, no stigma's right and just you know, and thestigma campaign and all that stuff. So I realized that they could be verypowerful. So I started thinking I would get, I would pay for theHashtag keep talking, because I felt like that was broad enough that it wouldn'tnarrow people down so much, to say just by polar disorder. They wouldbe able to talk about whatever conditions they were dealing with. But that wastaken. So then I just tacked on the MH on the end of it, and it wasn't taken. and Oh it was called the sites called twelveswww dot twubscom. That's still around. Huh, twelvecom, and you couldtaps register, kind of like registering a star on your name. You couldregister a Hashtag in your name exactly, and that's what I did with keeptalking mh, and it's just really blossoms from there and I'm so excited aboutit. How many people that use it? And it's funny because you know shedid this like a year ago now. It's been a while. It's beena while. And once she got on there, her first big ideawas, I want to get this thing corunt, you know, trending.I wanted to try and I wanted to trend. And you know, she'strying her little harder to get this thing to trend and no matter what shedid, it wouldn't come up in the actual you know how you yeah,are the left search and it's yeah, and all the trending ones, andshe got bummed out. I'm like, and I'm looking at going, butbabe, do you realize how many people are using your Hashtag right now?You know, and it kept spreading and then we started seeing famous people usingit and it's like, oh my gosh, this is becoming a thing. Yep, yeah, yeah, and the way you named it, I think, is important. I come from like a marketing and advertising background from theold days, and a lot of times when people have a message, especiallywhen it's activism, the message tends to be anti something like no more guns, or what about, you know, whatever the thing is of the moment. So I think it's it's really cool that you guys made the Hashtag bothproactive and a verb. So it's not like yeah, it's not like fucksuicide or all that kind of stuff, because, I mean, that's notsomething I can do. I can't. Suicide is not a thing and ifit were, I couldn't go do that to it every day. It doesn'treally make sense in the brain. But what you're saying with the Hashtag keeptalking, mh as the reminder, but nonetheless keep talking. I think it'sgreat, because that is the one thing that will keep somebody from actually killingthemselves. You cannot kill yourself while you're talking. Yeah, that's that's verytrue, you know, and and it's broad enough that it encompasses all ofmental health. All Right, mental illness, you know, and that was thatwas the goal. You know, it's not just bipolar, it's notjust depression, it's, you know, OCD, it's did, it's anxiety. Yeah, that's you, you name it. You know, if it'stied to mental health in some way, we should be talking about it.You know, our goal and our goal with the podcast to is to to, you know, we keep saying, get the word out on but justto break the stick and make it socially acceptable to talk about it. And, more importantly, not have it be demonized, you know, and likethis. The one problem that we've got going on right now immediately is thiswhole talk of guns and gun control and, you know, there's a certain sideof this that's trying to spin it as a demonization of mental illness.You know, the chief chief among us,...

...our attorney general, was trying todo that, you know, and it's like, cut it out,you know, don't demonize it, but help those that need it get thehelp. You know, yeah, provided scified. You know, that kindof thing exactly. You know, don't don't limit the treatment that people needand insist that people that want to buy guns do get, you know,testing for it. You know, and that's the thing that that kills me, and I'm going to say this really quick and get off my soapbox,because it drives me nuts. And we try really hard enough to talk politicson our shows. That's that's funny. Let me stop right there, becauseeverybody I listened to that has a mental health podcast says they try not totalk about podkat politics, but we do, and honestly, I think it's importantbecause we are humans in this world, like everybody else that votes and Ithink it's critical that we vote on our our issues. So, yes, this is true. This is true. My whole thing on it is,you know, for those of us that think those those people out therethat think you like, we had the march on Saturday and you know,it's all about banning guns. We don't want to ban guns, okay,we're not asking for a full on band of guns when I asking for arepeal the second amendment. We're all we want to do is have some tighterregulations, make it a little harder to get them. You know, douniversal background checks, do mental health checks. You know, if you go andget a car and you're driving a car, you have to have it. You have to pass a driver's license test, right, and you haveto do that. You have to go back for a renewal every five years, you know, and that's a car. And those guys like to bring upwell, you can kill people with cars, yeah, but you alsohave to jump through a bunch of hoops to get one of the first place. Yeah, the well regulated still at least do the well regulated part.If you want to have a militia, well regulated militia would mean not allowingcrazies into your club. No, no, exactly, you know. So that'sall we're asking for, you know, just concede a little bit. Everyother thing that's out there has protections, has has rules and has this andthat. You know, we're all protected by the First Amendment. Butyou can't run into a movie theater and Yell Fire. Right, exactly.That's not protected, you know. But according to their argument, yeah,you can run new movie theater and do that because it's your first amendment.Right. You know, why doesn't a second amendment get the same thing?Okay, I'm getting off my soapbox. No more second amendment. Let's goin. That's a super valid point, though, because if we've got mentalhealth advocates and activists say and, you know, tightened down on our ownpeople, then that's saying something. And if you've got the NI saying no, don't listen to the crazy people. We don't need to tighten down thecrazy people. It's just the whole thing is like we're in Lala land.But yeah, I digress. Let's get back to them. But yeah,so anyway, and but on your point, if you have a mental illness,don't hesitate to talk politics, engage in politics, and vote for thepeople that support funding for mental health initiatives. Whether or not you're opposed to gunsor not, that's really not not the issue at a right and asmuch is use some of that money to help the sick. Right exactly,you know. You know we're talking about it and we're trying to get theword out more, you know, but we also need the funding, weneed the help. We need, you know, psychiatrists and psychologists that arecompassionate, that are caring, that will listen to to the listen to usand they'll take an active interest in treating us. You know, backs doctorsand twenty, twenty years to finally find a good doctor. Yeah, andshe's and she's awesome and she listens and she cares to what Beck goes through. You know. Well, I guess the main problem is that people areway more expensive than pills, you know,...

...because that that's always been the keywith me. It's easy to find a doctor to prescribe pills of onedays or the other. It's much more difficult not only to find a therapistat all, but to find one that that could actually help, that's agood fit. So, yeah, I hear it. And then all justcost money. If people don't want crazy people running around the countryside, youknow, sleeping on the street corner, or if they believe crazy people areshooting up schools. If you don't want that happening, then fund mental healthinitiatives. That's all. Yeah, yeah, so we got like four minutes left. Let's let's hype some more things for you guys, because I lovehyping things. So okay, so the listener again, Becca Lombardo. UnderRebecca Lombardo wrote it's not your journey of failable on Amazon. That's awesome,and then you can always join Joe, Rebecca, myself all of the othercast of characters on twitter just by finding the Hashtag keep talking, mh.Click on that and you'll see us there, and if you don't see us,we'll see plenty of other people using it. And feel free to Hashtagthings when you bring it up, like Joe said, any kind of mentalhealth issue, because I think a lot of these are still in the kindof introductory process of scientific discovery. I don't think most scientists know what bipolardisorder is. Borderline personality disorders another strong connected disorder to bipolar. A lotof people have both of those and don't realize it or know it just becausedoctors haven't talked about it. And I definitely have anxiety disorders, post traumaticstress. You know this. Very few things, once you start peeling theonion back, that you realize you don't have. So I can appreciate that. Keep talking, MH. That kind of spreads out and let's everybody onthe spectrum communicate with each other to let it to let us know that we'renot alone. Basically, yeah, yeah, it's huge. Then you guys goto DBSA groups just out of curiosity. Do you know what that is?Yes, I do know what it is. I have not been.I just haven't planets haven't having aligned. But yeah, cool, but yes, I do, I do know what that is. Yeah, they're prettyfun it. So if anybody out there is a solo, a single doesn'thave a partner, try the DB Essay for Die Depression bipolar support alliance tome. Maybe you made a partner there. I want to do an episode ofa podcast about mental health dating, like people with mental health issues datingother people with mental health issues. HMM, it's yeah, that would be agood topic because, like, in part of me says, well,at least that person understands me. But on the other half you have societyout there going no, those fuckers shouldn't breed. So somewhere in between isis maybe equilibrium, but I'm always curious about that. You guys working onwhat? Like? How's your life like? Are you going to do different projects? Is the project the persistent, like keep the keep talking, mhs, Hashtag going, like persist with that. Your your book. I'll show you'realways promoting the book and then you have the podcast to promote the book. You do one other things. So let me get that clear. Sowhat is voices for change to? Oh that's your podcast name. Yeah,change. To point out it's version, because we started out with one networkand we left that network and started with a new one. So, Yep, we have to distinguish that. You. But shout out to left of straightradio network. Yes, absolutely, left of straight. I like that. That's a network like a they assembled podcasts of similar taste. I guess, is how they they are in Lgbtq network and you know, we onething that we pride ourselves on is we're allies. You know, sure,we absolutely support the LGBTQ community. You know, again, one thing thatI've always struggled with my entire life is discrimination. I don't I don't getit in any of its forms. You know. So you know by allmeans we support Lgbtq, and you,...

...our producer, Scott, is anawesome guy and we love them. You know, he's become a good friendof others. And why do you bring him up? Is He gay?Is He awesome gay? He is awesome gay. He's an awesome gay.All right, Scott, thanks for your help. Man. Yeah, heis. He is a big bear of a man and, like I said, we love them. He's a hell of a guy and you know,we're grateful to him for giving us a platform to do it we do.We wouldn't still be doing it if it weren't for him. That's all.Yeah, and his enthusiasm and everything. So, yeah, he takes everythingin stride. So we're in yeah, I'm in San Francisco. You speakof my language, brother sister, cheese and five joy that, excuse me, by other quality.

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